well, i have this problem with being wildly attracted to this
aloe plant in my kitchen, how's it's all sticky just makes me want it.
what should i do?
i have a fat friend named andy. he's ugly and stupid. he can't
find a woman so he jacks off everywhere. we used to go places together
but now i cant even go to wal-mart with him because he'll drop his
pants and start wacking in the middle of the store. how to make him
stop?
You most likely have a rare aloe plant called STICKIUS FUCKIU!!! The
problem is I am guessing you feed him Kibbles and Bits, am I right??
Yes!! Yes!! I am. What you got to do is feed it GoldFish Food. That
will solve the problem
I don't understand anything? What's wrong with me?
Your probably just fucking dumb.
I have a penile but no gland. Please help me
Allow me masterbate the vaginirial disease of the typical scrotum and
therefore undushing the testicality.
Dear Tim,
Instead I think you should shop at K-Mart. They have much lower
prices!
My boyfriend has two penises. The problem is that both can't
fit in my mouth. He's also uncorodinated and tells me he can not
jack-off with both hands, because he has to be fair to both of them.
Also, when I have sex with him I have to stick both of those big hairy
guys into me. It gets very tiring. Fallafel man, what should I do?
Maybe you could help me both physically and mentally.
Mother Teresa
Well I have only one dick (hint-hint)
Can you tell what websites to visit if I'd like to know the many ways of
how to kill a human? Information like: six pounds of pressure at a __
degree angle breaks a knee (I know that, but dont wish to reveal it)
From BKChaos
If you want to kill humans you must visit Jolly Rancher's
Anarchy site. But until then here's another juicy one. If you
hold a gun at a 0 degree angle to a head and apply pressure to the
trigger.................................
dear fella,
my girlfriend's mom has been comming on to me. i mean, REALLY hard. i
will "conveniently" "walk-in" on her shaving her legs NAKED, ect..
she is like 50 something, but i am sometimes tempted to just
"go for it". what should i DO. and then she has this dog, but
lets not talk about that....thanx.
Well I think you should start hitting on her dog. Then she will
become insainly jealous and you just might get lucky!!!
Dear Fallafel,
dEAR "FALLAFEL"
BEFORE i Ask My QUEsstion i just wanted to tell you that you are such
an inspiration to me! You are the best advice person since
Ann Landers. I have a homepage too. My column is "ASk Cornholia".
I'm thinking of renaming it "Ass-k Cornholia", but don't know how
my readers would react. Whatshould I do?
Jferfer
I would recommend naming it "Ass-k the Ass!!!!" This would really
catch the reader's attention. Or maybe you could name it
"ASSASSASSASS-K CoRnHolIa if you really want e-mail.
dear falaffel,
today i caught my dad trying to eat the cats shit. He later told me it
was nothing and i should go play w/ my darts. funny thing is I HAVE
NO DARTS. Then later, i heard him telling my mom that he was going
to "stick it" to her and she was going to smell. Something is really
fucking wrong with my parents what should i do?
Sincerely, Spikey Poop
So Young, So young. They pray on the very young. Take a deep breath
before you read this Spikey Poop but.................Your parents
are gigantic penguins in constumes!!!!!! All you gots to do is
wait till they go to sleep and stick a large chunk of Monteray
Jack Cheese under their pillow. Then their costumes will flop of
and you will see them for who they really are!!!!
AND NOW FOR THE MOST IMPORTANT PART!!!!
EMAIL ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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